This was a life-changing moment when I prayed a big question to God and He answered. I want to encourage everybody to pray dangerous prayers today, then listen and keep your eyes and ears open for His answer. Do not be afraid of not getting an answer, He will do anything He can to build your faith if you are pursuing Him.
I’ve been struggling a lot with some things that I question in the Bible. Some stories, some points, when it was written, etc. But when you have that doubt, it makes you question the validity of the entire Bible. So there I was, avoiding the Bible for a few days.
This has all been a recent development, so when I told this to some close friends they were very surprised by the change. They talked to me about it, tried talking me out of it, used scripture… I just wasn’t convinced. One of my friends who just got back from a mission trip was reading something she wrote in her journal about spiritual warfare. She wrote that when Satan finds your weakness, the chink in your armor, he targets it constantly; if you don’t put on the Armor of God (Ephesians 6:10-18), you will be susceptible to his attacks. That’s when it clicked. My soft spot in my armor has always been fear of disappointing the man in my life and the fear of not pleasing him.
Ethan is a very analytical thinker, he grows his faith by disproving theories with God’s help. He thrives in healthy debating and asking questions. However, the questions we faced were sitting very deeply in me… too much so. So then I wondered: maybe I’m not cut out for searching through these theories with Ethan… Maybe that is not how I am wired.
Then I got home, and I knew I needed to hear the Bible is truth from God Himself before I really bought it. No amount of evidence from others could give it the validity that God Himself could, and that is what I needed.
So I grabbed my Bible and prayed something like “God, is this book truth… Is this book Your word alone… God, tell me if I should believe it.” Then I opened to Proverbs 30. My stomach flipped when I read this:
“Every word of God is flawless; He is a shield to those who take refuge in Him. Do not add to His words, or He will rebuke you and prove you a liar.” (Proverbs 30:5-6)
Since that moment, my heart and soul have been at peace. I feel like I’m back home.
Ethan and I talked about this too, if you were wondering. It was rough at first, but we’ve come to this agreement: I will look into theories and questions with him as long as he is prepared for a faith based and/or scriptural answer.