Unexpected pregnancy is terrifying, but it is also an opportunity for God to show you His true colors.
The most amazing thing about our God is that He can turn an awful situation into a beautiful blessing. And not even just a blessing for us as the new mothers, but for tens, hundreds, thousands, and, dare I say, millions of others. Maybe even young women or couples facing the same circumstances.
Being a young single mom and a Christian, I’ve surrounded myself with other young women in the same position, fighting the same battles, something I highly recommend. All of us were deeply impacted by motherhood for the better. My 3 closest mommy friends really surrendered to Jesus when faced with their seemingly impossible situation. It has been a tough road, but so much greatness has come from it. Some examples:
- this blog and my passion for ministry to help young women walk with Jesus
- my friend’s passion for helping young moms in community and providing them with support – God has shown her her purpose and she is now going to start a non-profit for single mothers
- my mother was faced with unexpected pregnancy of her own, and then mine – now she is a mentor at a pregnancy clinic and an active member of our chruch’s single moms group
When faced with unexpected pregnancy and you don’t know where else to turn, look up. Give your situation, your baby, yourself to God and let Him take control. He will not leave you or forsake you, and He never will.
I didn’t understand God’s love for me until I had my daughter. The love a mother has for her child is incomparable to anything else in this world. I don’t even know how to describe it, but from the moment you wrap your head around having a child and fully accept it, a love will grow that is so deep you will never be the same. You’ll never look at the world the same, you’ll never look at yourself the same, you’ll never look at children and families the same, you’ll never look at God the same.
Knowing how deep your love runs for your baby is just a glimpse into how deep God’s love for us runs. He created us each individually and carefully. He is our father and mother (He created both man and woman in His image, so He is both to us!). His love for us is perfect, unending, unbiased, and unshakable. We love our children as they are, and we have no say in who they are as people for the most part. Their personality is engrained in them from the time they are conceived. God created them that way. How much deeper His love for us must be, knowing that each part of our personality He personally chose, tweaked, and perfected. I cannot imagine. A creation made perfect by Him, exactly as He wanted us to be.
I want to talk about abortion, because whether you dismiss the thought or entertain it, the the option is there. Like I said, my mom volunteers at a pregnancy center. They don’t do abortions there, they educate and empower young women faced with this situation. They don’t sugar coat it when explaining what actually happens during abortions. They give you the truth. The sad, disturbing, and heart-breaking truths of the procedure and what to expect afterwards.
From the research I’ve done and the recounts from friends and the things my mom has learned from her training, here are the reasons why abortion should never be an option:
1. It is NOT a quick fix. It may free up some money, it may free up some time, but that money and time will probably go into counseling at some point. My mom said that they have support groups and counselors around the clock at the pregnancy center because so many women didn’t realize how extraordinarily painful each day after would be. Each day they live in regret and wonder what could have been. Could they have done it. What would they have looked like. They’d be 3 years old soon. The list never ends. It’s a regret that NEVER disappears. Beware when researching abortion information, they make it sound so casual and run-of-the mill. They focus on the procedure itself, not the gravity of what’s actually happening.
2. There are serious physical repercussions. Having an abortion can leave permanent scarring in your uterus, making it very difficult, even impossible for some, to have another baby when you are ready. It also puts future children at higher risks of developmental complications. Abortions double the chance of ovarian, cervical, and liver cancer. It also increases the risk of breast cancer. Here are some helpful links – Abortion Risks: A list of major physical complications related to abortion
3. Adoption IS an option. I’ve heard so many young women say “I could never do that,” though they seriously consider an abortion. That is only our selfish nature. Our selfish nature tells us it would be hard seeing our children flourish with another family. That thought needs to go. You could kill your child because you don’t want to see them happy with somebody else, or you could focus on the fact that you love them and would do anything for them. Give them life. Whether it’s with you or another family. There is a long long long waiting list for babies, and you can set up adoption plans easily at pregnancy centers. There is a long long long waiting list for babies, and you can set up adoption plans easily at pregnancy centers.
4. You can’t bare the embarrassment/shame. I know that carrying around a big belly for 9 months, not married, and young is extremely hard. Even embarrassing and shameful at times. Like you’re wearing your sins and bad decisions for all to see. That is ONLY the way that society sees you. That is the way that people who don’t deserve to cast judgement on you see you. You are making God so proud by being such a courageous, strong, and selfless young woman by giving that baby life. That’s how I would see you. That’s how anybody who’s ever faced this situation would see you.
5. God has a specific purpose for everybody, and every baby has the potential to change the world. God created them, clearly He has a plan for them. We can’t cut it short out of fear. Their life could be the difference between war and peace, salvation and damnation, you name it. We have to let God do His work.
6. Doing the impossible is God’s specialty – He will help you have the baby and raise it if that’s what you’re called to do. If you’re praying hard about your situation and you feel like God is telling you to raise the baby yourself, you gotta trust Him. Trust him to lead you as a parent when you have no idea what you’re doing. Trust Him that He’ll make ends meet with money. Trust Him that He’ll lead you to the right man for both of you if you haven’t found him yet. Where I’m from, there’s rent assistance, childcare assistance, food assistance, food assistance specific for pregnant women, infants and toddlers (called WIC), pell grants for college… There are lots of help resources out there. Also, if you research pregnancy centers you may find one near you that will help with baby supplies as well.
I know that rape is always the argument people bring up to those against abortion. I cannot imagine going through that, and if you have, I am so sorry you did and I’d love to help any way I can. I, however, still believe that God CAN turn any situation into something to glorify Him, and we have to trust that He will. We can’t repay evil with evil.
Some good articles about what’s going on with the baby during abortions: 20 weeks and older feel pain, Expert Tells Congress Unborn Babies Can Feel Pain Starting at 8 Weeks, I Was Betrayed By a Pill, Abortion Regrets, Prenatal Development, support for pregnant teens, support for pregnant college and career women